Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
What kind of codes do pirates scan? Q-Arrrr Codes! Hahaha just kidding, they don't scan them either.
MORMON ELECTION GAME: Every time Romney becomes president, drink.
BREAKING: Netflix to phase out DVDs and streaming, focus on apologies.
Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind? Facebook is a compelling argument for yes.
In protest of SOPA I haven't updated my blog in like six years.
Romney makes a lot of sense if you mentally add "BY MAGIC!" after each of his promises.
"Governor Romney, you have two minutes to paraphrase what the President just said as if it were your own position."
How many people on the Internet does it take to change a lightbulb? None, but 600,000 would "raise awareness" of the dark.
Under “List Your Strengths” I put “Unable to follow directions”.
Horse Meat Discovered in iPads
I like my women like I like my attention deficit disorder is getting worse I think
This is your tri-monthly reminder that if you don't cry during "The Iron Giant" you have failed the Voight-Kampff test.
The IKEA cafe is now serving Harlem Shakes. They make them by beating a dead horse.
Just got an email from my boss—we’re all getting laid!!
Hang on, there’s another word.
I accidentally asked a woman who wasn’t pregnant if she was but recovered by asking if she wanted to be and raising an eyebrow.