Give me 20 minutes and I'll be ready to go again #candyheartrejects

Best shirt yet IMO - Check out the sweet @shopify shirt in @startupthreads monthly subscription service  https://www.startupthreads.com 

Best Viewed In NetScape. RT @bourbonghost: Why hasn't  http://scout.com  updated their website since 1993?

And Aubren fans can shut the entire hell up about it. Go be 3-9 for a while longer.

If nothing else, the results of this election should let GOP stalwarts know that intolerance will not be accepted by the American people.

And so it was, God looked and saw that man was alone, and so he created a helpmate. I like to think he had @winelibrarian in mind here. #FF

Ba-dump-bump, former White House Deputy COS. He's here all week. RT @joshualyman: @mattplanet That's not my LIBOR you're manipulating!

I really don't have anything to say.

So Andre Ware picks Wazzu to "upset" the Aubs in Week One...my only question is why would that be an upset?

I'm Ron Burgandy? RT @bourbonghost: @steelerstide74 I still don't think you got it?

<-- STUMPED RT @deolacola: My ex's new girlfriend keeps on sending me good morning texts. What that mean?

@cyheisman @debbiedc_rtr @underthejewfro Two words: GROUP TEXT.

@bourbonghost Allow me to answer that in the most @therock way possible... IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW MANY PEOPLE THE ROCK FOLLOWS!

Best part of that quote. RT @banditref: "the Big 12 or whatever it is.." - Nick Saban

@bourbonghost @nicorbr up next: those heavy sackcloth ponchos you can only buy at western clothing stores.

EVERYBODY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD APPARENTLY. RT @mrknicknack: Who trying to get me to the next stage of candy crush

<--- Star SG for Strayer RT @mrknicknack: all this time i coulda been puttin up 20 ppg playing for virginia college?

Got to mix in a big breakfast from time to time. RT @mrknicknack: a nigga aint tryna eat biscuits every damn day

Is there anything Jennifer Lawrence does that isn't super cute and genuine?

@bourbonghost I'd like to laugh but that's more heartbreaking than anything. I'll just be over here loving my kid as normal as possible.