@jennyjohnsonhi5 @joelhousman Impossible, in the same way it's impossible for people who've rescued a dog to not mention it.

Remember when we'd miss the Super Bowl because of church?

Metro gate just closed on a body area I value greatly. So much for having kids. @unsuckdcmetro

@theimpulsivebuy @grubgrade @junkfoodguy @onsecondscoop The Nosh Show is pretty much the only thing that keeps me going on Mondays. Cheers.

@unsuckdcmetro New Pentagon bus bay locations are programmed into Trip Planner. Just enter a date March 24 or later.

@unsuckdcmetro Signage all over Pentagon bus bays warning of relocations coming March 24. Heard anything?

@tj_whitehead According to Ahmedinijad, no. According to everyone else, yes.

I know shit's about to go down because Brian Williams did the NBC Nightly News from DC. #Sequestration #BriWi

Preschool is a few hundred dollars a week? Yet another reason not to procreate. #WHSocial #SOTU

The Ikea hotels won't have Ikea furniture? Then WHAT IS THE POINT?

The 4:57 21D #Metrobus from Pentagon left at 4:51. The driver smiled as he drove off and abandoned us at the bus bay. @wmata @unsuckdcmetro

Apropos of nothing: I miss Chicago.

@adambearne @unsuckdcmetro Metro wants to know the exact demographics of the people they're screwing.

@bobrox Air five! We are the 99%

It's "feed a cold, feed a fever," right?

@unsuckdcmetro @wmata MT @nicolevins: Drama on the Courthouse platform. Someone tell me what's happening, please!! #wmata

Just saw a meteor over I-395 in Virginia. Scariest. Shit. Ever. #holdme

@joelhousman As the storm approaches, I imagine you sitting in front of several screens, occasionally rubbing your hands together in glee.

Those lights must be awfully bright. Renee Zellweger is squinting something fierce. #Oscars

Dear lord, it's like an episode of Scooby Doo. #Oscars