I have a truly amazing gift in forgetting the names of people moments after I meet them.

I honestly feel like LeBron could lead the Bobcats to the finals if he wanted to

#PerksOfDatingMe I don't fart in front of you for the first month

Happy one year anniversary to one of my top 37 favorite couples, @shaylynsinclair and @robsurbrook !

I hope bad things happen to bad people

iTunes and facebook have always amazed me because every time they "update" their product, it's much more shitty than the version before it

If I'm drinking.... Tweet city. If I'm smokin.... What's twitter?

I took my safety patrol job so seriously in 5th grade after 9/11 #dutyandhonor

Are the refs gonna line up behind IU players and shake states hands after this game?

I have talked to Rob's "automated voice messaging system" more in my life than I've talked to Rob.

It's the most wonderful day of the week! There will be pitchers a flowing and smiles a glowing and I can't wait eeeeek

I've watched some classic performances from the NBA, and I've never seen someone as unstoppable as B #mindblown

Really excited to officially be a Michigan State Spartan

Duke would never last a whole season in the big ten

I'm not sure there's a movie that makes me want to write more than Midnight in Paris

Nothing like my car breaking down IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD pic.twitter.com/DpMIulsq

#presh pic.twitter.com/pCCuZBSQ

I love people who are self proclaimed "job interview experts." What does that mean, that you've been unsuccessful in tons of job interviews?

I don't care what you think of his policy, we have one cool president  http://imgur.com/a/X6186#0 

I fucking love midland people