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Has anyone buried some Harry Potter books in the desert so we can start another religion in 2000 years?
Probably used his real name and address when he made his PlayStation Network account.
In 50 years, our chart-toppers have gone from "I wanna hold your hand" to "to the sweat drop down my balls." Sad.
"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine." -Abraham Lincoln
Family Radio, despite being certain of tomorrow's impending apocalypse, gave a 5-day forecast today.
I really wish someone would write a song about what a good time they're having at the club tonight.
For those keeping score at home, we can grow new organs from stem cells, but our soda machines are unable to accept a face-down dollar bill.
There are few things in life as heartbreaking as pressing the wrong button on the vending machine.
Every time I turn on the radio, I remember why I don't turn on the radio.
When facebook first opened, I wasn't allowed to join because my Berklee email didn't end in .edu. Now you can attend Hogwarts.
Why do we offer others a penny for their thoughts but assume ours are worth two cents?
Last week, I looked deep into my dog's eyes and whispered "You're adopted."
Crap! I was supposed to be a teenage dream tonight, but I can't find my skintight jeans. Now I feel like a plastic bag. :(
Look at this photograph. Every time I do it makes me laugh. @jasonmunday http://twitpic.com/61o1z2
I just tried this new game called "going outside." The graphics were really awesome but the pacing is pretty slow.
I used to be in a band called 1023 Megabytes. We just couldn't get a gig. (Stolen from @reddit)
I play songs on the internet. Some people listen to them.
