• Hola!

    Please Sign In

    Favstar gets even better if you sign in.

    Here's why signing in is good for you.

    • You get a personalized view of Favstar based on the people you follow.
    • Your favs and retweets are collected instantly, meaning your status and stats get updated at blazing speeds.
    • Use lists to manage your friends, and keep on top of where the fav-love is happening.

    Your account is safe, of course!

    • We never see your twitter password.
    • We won't tweet or follow anyone without your permission.
    • We only use your API calls when you fav, retweet, or follow someone.
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    I went to the gyno yesterday for a checkup. He told me to stop masturbating. I asked why. He said "Because I'm trying to examine you!"

    • 17
    • FAVS
    VoiceofgarthThe_Dorksterimalilfrazystupendu5hanersl1zerdkjax82twitsandgiggles
    • 5
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazykjax82BristolSweetsCommanderHaloRawWhore
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Please, get your knickers in a twist. They are easier to fling across the room.

    • 16
    • FAVS
    The_Dorkster5hanersgmossiiRamblingMachinePapa_Doble_iTomFooleryPatricio_SageSilentDigressor
    • 4
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazyShoutingGoddess1HappytwitRawWhore
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    A stork might bring you a baby, but a swallow never will.

    • 9
    • FAVS
    The_Dorksterimalilfrazy5hanersGumbus1975naughtynaffitMuath_tuBulldog0613toddintime
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazyGumbus1975bigTman001
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Crazy? I was crazy once. They put me in a home. I died there. That's when the worms came. Worms. I hate worms. They drive me crazy. Crazy?

    • 10
    • FAVS
    imalilfrazyvivalacrapRamblingMachineClakeBent1HappytwitzombieparrotThe_DorksterFinal_Exit
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazyzombieparrotFormerGrunt
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    I find it difficult to get a conversation going if you don't have your ankles behind your ears.

    • 21
    • FAVS
    VoiceofgarthThe_DorksterNefariousOdditystupendu5hanersBristolSweetsRamblingMachinePapa_Doble_
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazyBristolSweetsSgtButtCheeks
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    It looks like RTs get me more followers than my own shit. The penny drops. I need to change my AVI to my vagina.

    • 14
    • FAVS
    BristolSweetsRamblingMachinePapa_Doble_theedgeofchrisThe_DorksterxxxthedavexxxPaul_Regogavinpivott
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazyPaul_RegoGreenSmoke_
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    "Party on dudes" is not the same as "Party on, dudes".

    • 9
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterimalilfrazystupenduTXFloormangavinpivottClearlyUnwellTFrissNodine13
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazyNodine13TXPerv
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Every fight is a food fight when you're a cannibal.

    • 15
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterimalilfrazyBristolSweetsgmossiiJTQuestRamblingMachinegavinpivottAndrewInAction_
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazygavinpivottfaultymoonpie
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    I like to make the people I follow comfortable by giving them a RT. It eases the blow when they realize I'm stalking them from afar.

    • 8
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterTXFloormanPapa_Doble_gavinpivottTFrissMikeJordanBrok_beecsamsara668
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    TXFloormansamsara668
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Who do you have to fuck around here to get a RT? Your husband? Ok. Send him in with his pants off.

    • 15
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterBristolSweetsTXFloormanRamblingMachinePapa_Doble_CarpentersCrackAndrewInAction__Prozach74
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    imalilfrazythespacewad
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Where are the boys?
    I have a milkshake.

    • 5
    • FAVS
    The_Dorkstercrayan9JuanFuctasticoTheTennisPhenomgeniusindisgize
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    geniusindisgize
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    My friends tell me I'm too condescending.
    That word means I talk down to people.

    • 1
    • FAV
    RawWhore
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    gracesaif
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    My friend reckons I use words without knowing what they mean, which is ironic, because she told me that on a Wednesday.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterAVirtuousLiarthatUPSdude1HappytwitthespacewadThe_Nouski
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    1Happytwit
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Wish you were beer...

    • 8
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterTXFloormanJTQuestPapa_Doble_1HappytwitsirshuckyDoom_Jedisiamonday
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    sirshucky
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Geez! I go have a shower and you're all pregnant!

    • 3
    • FAVS
    VorespawnnPhelendriqalgorrdano
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    nPhelendriqal
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Fact: Males who pee whilst sleep walking shouldn't even bother going to the toilet. They would make less of a mess in their cupboard.

    • 10
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterRamblingMachinePaul_RegoFunnyNotFoundHapInTheCapDiscoLemonKayySgtButtCheeksPaxochka
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    SgtButtCheeks
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Is this corner of twitter taken?

    • 8
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterJTQuestPapa_Doble_gavinpivottCarpentersCrackheated_nPhelendriqalUnFitz
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    GreenSmoke_
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Just finished. I know it's not Ace of Cakes but you can tell what it is right?
    Does this get me an entry as best mum? http://t.co/tmNqGJ8T

    • 7
    • FAVS
    PrettiestPickleExcuseMyTweetsYesThatAmyThe_Dorksterheated_UnFitzcynicanoldicus
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    The_Dorkster
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Got a phone call at work today. It was the wrong number. He said "sorry I thought this was somebody else's number." I said, "It is"...

    • 7
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterstupenduTXFloormangavinpivottCarpentersCrackTheLizzyKsamsara668
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    samsara668
  • missingcrayon
      alias @missingcrayon

    Just opened a letter on the way to bed. Dear Sir/Madam.
    I realized I'm part lesbian. They know it too.

    • 7
    • FAVS
    The_DorksterTXFloormangavinpivottolvera_mSilentDigressorgorrdanoSpdrman59
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    gorrdano
@missingcrayon

@missingcrayon