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I asked this broad for sex on the beach and she hands me this bullshit drink. I slammed that shit, then i tried that drink, it wasn't for me
I hate being dry.
Anyone else feel like gettin' slippery tonight?
They need to invent a pill that makes it soft.
Mitch loves you all equally but in very different waves.
I tried running on the beach this morning but with every step the sand turned to glass
The girl I nailed 3 weeks ago just tried to tell me she wasn't pregnant as an april fools joke. That's impossible!
when I die i hope to come back as a surf board that Hobie will someday ride. Or sun screen that he use so i can still protect him forever.
#ff my dick
every time i get into the ocean, all the sharks get out
I only came here to do two things. drink some beer and save some lives, looks like we're almost out of beer