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Behind every popular Twitter personality, there's a romantic partner wanting them to put down the iPhone.
If at first you don't succeed, pay someone to take a photo of you holding a microphone.
Steve Jobs wouldn't have apologized for Maps. He'd say bad directions were a feature leading you on an adventure. Like an acid trip.
Whenever a Twitter friend stops tweeting for weeks on end, I worry something horrible happened. Like they got a job.
Staring out the window instead of looking at your phone every minute is the new vinyl records.
We once worried someone monitored what we said online. Now, we hope someone is watching and communicate accordingly.
Dear Democrats: Okay, we get it! Obama was supposed to be perfect. Now, forgive him or you're going to get another Republican in office.
Over the past few years, Twitter's 140-character limit saved me from destroying my career. Google+'s unlimited will reverse that in a week.
Wait, our favorite startup got acquired and then started to suck?! That never happens!
The 20-somethings who hate kids later become the 39-year-olds who Instagram 50 photos of their babies per day as if they invented parenting.
The tech industry is like high school math class. A small group know what's going on, with the rest copying their work.
Thinking about becoming a life coach for hipsters. First tip: Quit your band and become a graphic designer. Same clothes, yet more money.
Don't get mad. Get funny.
The problem with calling yourself an expert: Most people who are good at things don't like to talk about it. They like to do those things.
Something magic happens when you transition from thinking about what humans should do to what humans do.
If you want to appear cultured and better than everyone, but don't want to do something hard like read a book, become a foodie.
Tip: When an advertising creative gives you a hard time, just stop and ask: "You still upset your band never hit it big?"
Radiohead's career mirrors many of our lives. Start out fun and accessible. Grow slow and weird.
Have advised household names & been running social media programs for more than a decade. This is where I make fun of myself.