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I stay strong & refuse to buy chocolate when i go shopping. Then i get home & i'm sad i don't have chocolate.
(Julia) Louis (-Dreyfus)
I guess we know what they've been watching lately.
Hmm, I just said "you bet your sweet bippy" to a guy. Yeh, I'm surprised I'm single too...
Probably the best thing about twitter is i no longer call /text people when i'm drunk.
3wks ago i had a date. I've heard nothing, til today. I got a mssg, asking for the name of a website we discussed. This one may not work out
If you look for a reason to be annoyed, you'll find it
'Cool Runnings' is on. Must be Olympics time again
It's always good to make comments like "mmm, that looks nice" when driving w' your parents past a retirement village #KeepThemInLine
Oh ffs! Heard someone refer to Brad Pitt as a "hero for standing by her decision" to get a dbl masectomy. No, that's what a partner does
The day u finish a boxset: bit sad u've finished, bit excited to start a new one. The closest u'll ever get 2 knowing how ppl w' goals feel
I like when men do s'thing considerate on a date. I mean, I could do it myself, but it's sweet he carried the tray w' both our Happy Meals
The reason i don't want ppl to find me, is the same reason i no longer update fb. I find it easier to be myself, if no one knows who i am
why is it, every time i start exercising something hurts?
phone's predictive text didn't have bastards. Does now.
More than 48 hrs has passed since I ate chocolate. Still not skinny.
When a reporter says the person is "lucky to be alive" I tend to think "aren't we all?"
Monday- free refills on slurpees! I'm planning my day around it. Going to hit as many 7 elevens as I can. Cos, you gotta set goals in life
Wow, my carpet changed colour! It's amazing. I used something called a 'vacuum cleaner'. I think they're new
Morning tv 'experts' explaining how to tweet. "5-10 tweets per day is ideal" hahaha
omg that was scary. I couldn't get on twitter for 10 minutes. Worse; i couldn't tweet about not being able to get on twitter