I just ate a big sausage and it was amazing! Now I know what all the fuss is about.

Sometimes there's no distinction between a horrid movie and a horror movie.

I think there's a lot more antimatter than scientists think there is. In fact I can't think of anything that really matters right now.

I could wax on and wax off about stuff all day.

I like how the birds start chirping so you know when to clamp down on nature.

@cravenheart I Nom nom nominate your brains!

RIP @cravenheart My tastiest follower.

I feel sorry for the couples that meet up in real life and are disappointed. I wish someone would make a movie about that shit.

I'm hungry. Can you recommend your tastiest Tweeter?

@depreciated @TheBosha Thanks for the tip, Fuckwadagensia.

Don't tell me how to fucking Tweet.

@TheButterflyMon Hi Mon.

Tip: Get drunk and never sober up.

Dear Folks,

I ran out of TotD's giving them to @llvvzz.

If you had bigger tits and were nicer you might have gotten one.

Have a nice day.

The good Doctors see a boner as a sign of respect.

I invented a new card game. It's called 'Magic: The Gathering in My Pants'.

I rarely read tweets about incest. There just isn't enough royalty on Twitter.

Important Relationship Tip: Boobs

@reneeeck Yeah sure, of course they do. They must exist. I don't know of any. Na. They're probably gone. Chat? Never heard of it.

Do you guys know what quantum entanglement is? I only ask because I hate to get stuck in the wrong chat room.