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aaaaaaaaaaand @nickkroll invented the "new phone who dis" joke before all of us https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrQujhQgoRM#t=259 …
wud b crazy if twitter let u view at replies of all the ppl u blocked or muted as a filter option it wud b like staring into bowels of hell
ExcedrinMild is perfect for making a headache feel a lil better but not letting you lose any emotional leverage you have w/ your "headache"
family togetherness is a powerful aphrodisiac jk
"Even though I didn't ask thank you for summarizing that New Yorker article." -a thing that has never been said
ME: I have 2 cats. LITTLE GIRL: Are they valuable to you? ME: Yes, I love them. LITTLE GIRL: Do you have any friends?
My Thanksgiving wish is that every time someone says they ate so much they're going to explode, they actually do.
We had a typical family Thanksgiving. 1 dead, 3 wounded.
Dog show announcers are so fucking supportive of one another.
If your family doesn't accept you this Thanksgiving, remember that you will always find acceptance within your JUGGALO FAMILY.
"Whiplash" is astounding. Believe the hype. My heart was still pounding 10 minutes after the credits rolled.
Instead of lip syncing why don't singers at award shows just show dope music videos or just email us YouTube links
Tonight the Cowboys show how terrible they can be. It's always games they should win. I'm gonna be there for the heart stabbing this time. 😱
Um, I took two semesters of stage combat, I think I'll be okay at this MMA fight.
#KROLLSHOW on Comedy Central, Ruxin on THE LEAGUE on FXX, nickkroll on instagram
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