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Retweet this if you are a beautiful strong black woman who don't need no man.
As much as I love her, Lady Gaga is just early Madonna with some form of autism.
Tim Burton should make a film called 'Johnny Depp' where Johnny Depp is played by Helena Bonham-Carter.
Retweeting one of my tweets without starring it, is like fucking me but refusing to kiss me.
I'm going to start ending love letters with "or else."
If you can't handle me at my Lindsay Lohan, you don't deserve me at my Beyonce.
I wish death on people on a daily basis but it's only because I am dead inside and envy their ability to seem outwardly alive.
Khloe Kardashian looks like she was born inside of a mountain and smashed her way out.
Facebook needs a 'Your baby looks the same as yesterday' button.
It's as if John Travolta and Daryl Hannah did a load of crystal meth in the 80's and Ke$ha was born.
Lily Allen has called her daughter Ethel. It must have been really hard giving birth to an 84 year old woman.
When someone asks me if I'm single, they have no right to get freaked out when I burst into tears and cling onto them.
RETWEET IF YOU SUPPORT GAY MARRIAGE.
It isn't murder if they flirted with your boyfriend.
How do you get a fat girl into bed? Piece of cake.
I get through every day by thinking of my toes as a little family living on my foot.
I'm a big fan of 50 Cent, or as he's known in Rwanda, Four Hundred Million Dollars.
I just want a man who will be the Gomez to my Morticia.
If I was ever wounded & someone poured alcohol on it I wouldn't scream in pain I'd scream cos they were wasting alcohol! My mouth's up here!
You know you drank too much last night when you have to put on sunglasses to open the fridge.