Popular Recent Faved By Given
Friends: 165
Followers: 1,373
Favs Given: 16,950
Favs Rec'd: 12,315
@nonsequiturific's (Non Sequiturific) recent favourites. See who @nonsequiturific favs the most...
thesearedays
Was just cleaning the kitchen table. Picked up AND ATE what I thought was a Frosted Flake. Was a BBQ chip from last night. New lows are fun.
@thesearedays
4
nonsequiturificEightBitsShortamynicole21the_dza
gneicco
It's a lot less expensive to step on a crack in Canada that it is in the U.S.
@gneicco
12
CroweJamMissPrissUSABrain_WashkambrockTymethiefnonsequiturificthefemmenoiroinkflapnavanaxbeingtheoMorrosPunkrockie
gneicco
There's only one thing nicer than lying in bed next to your mom: Lying to her over the phone.
@gneicco
3
nonsequiturificnavanaxkambrock
crustyjuggler72
I bet those candy buttons on a wax strip make a really boring story in braille.
@crustyjuggler72
adamisacson
Nobody told me that mid-life crisis would be so wrenching. But I'm seriously thinking about switching from Altoids to Tic Tacs.
@adamisacson
dresspants
This has been a very trying week and I've got absolutely nothing of value to add to your Twitter stream. Penis.
@dresspants
8
angryoldcootbestgirlbettyBettyLiesBlondHousewifeamynicole21juicymorselnonsequiturificTrick_or_tweet
sween
If you think getting your period is worse than being hit in the nuts, just imagine it happening every MONTH.

What?

Really?

Huh.
@sween
CranberryPerson
Grabbing a sharpie to cross out my bracket losers with a demeanor similar to Travolta demanding a marker so he can stab Uma in the heart.
@CranberryPerson
wordtoyourmom
Dear World, I apologize on behalf of this airport for the multitude of pink velour sweatsuits that will soon be landing in your countries.
@wordtoyourmom
5
MODATraiselmroughdictionkambrocknonsequiturific
baileygenine
It's not so much that I can't focus it's thaFOCus, FOCUS, foakus, foacuss, what a weird word.
@baileygenine
sloganeerist
Sorry, Chewy Chips Ahoy. I'm afraid your pals, Paper Bag and Plastic Tray, can't go where you're going. Don't cry. You'll meet new friends.
@sloganeerist
CranberryPerson
Home improvement has completely destroyed my back, but at least I get to writhe in pain on my BRAND NEW FLOOR.
@CranberryPerson
crabapplez
Maybe if I hadn't filled out my bracket on St. Patrick's Day I wouldn't have had Notre Dame going all the way to the final.
@crabapplez
7
stupenduDexter_ColtjordonmworldwarmikeCroweJamnonsequiturificFriedaClub
toldorknown
Welsh isn't a language, it's a compression algorithm.
@toldorknown
biorhythmist
Shrödinger? I hardly know whether she's alive or not!
@biorhythmist
104
awryonedrwsemperjefffrageelayafoolishwitjebrophyllissteindwinemanajinairbeepdarcikelleynorak_Zaius13mandaHNKlonelysandwich89VIEW
ALL
InSoOutSo
Finally, us professionals can get back to drinking. What's more, today has the shortest pub lines of the year.
@InSoOutSo
16
drwTymethiefsquibblephyllissteinDDDBUfactualfictionnonsequiturificsucittaMMrBigFistscovertheearthluckyshirtsmithjeremyunanythingtoosweet4rnrKryssi_Beemahoneypony
muchty
You'd think French doors would be easier to open.
@muchty
10
drwbrokenlifecoryd9hisnamesLenTrick_or_tweetnonsequiturificdavio1962davegorumtjcrabapplez
luckyshirt
I wonder if cats joke with each other about "dropping the kids off at the beach".
@luckyshirt
stevewhitaker
The League of Military Poultry is commanded by Colonel Sanders and General Tso.
@stevewhitaker
RexHuppke
I wonder if my tweets resent me because I don't protect them.
@RexHuppke
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