Best news all year long, @treesdallas & @mickeyavalon. I'm bringing a girl with #cakedupmakeup pic.twitter.com/bc1lUEHIvg

“@heyitshigbe: @dangerkitty2020 @cdkellerson and I saw two grackles bumping uglies at @target.” pic.twitter.com/oKgovHXmHR

“@heyitshigbe: .@lablair good. Be safe... @ogb4, where are you?”<--tried to RT from the basement but no dice. A-OK. pic.twitter.com/4sCFhOcFtQ

Seems the st of Pa isn't done watching @justinbrown19 ball just yet. #OU was lucky enough this yr to see why. Congrats, GL, & thank you.

“@heyitshigbe: but then you're stuck with a frozen turkey. @americanair”<-- bowling!! Duh!?!?! Happy Turkey Day, Higs! U 2 AA Tweet Person.

“@americanair All complaints are handled in writing.”<--I thought that's what all these characters we're reading were? You can fix this.

For the record, @americanair's media/cus relations group is all over it on this one. #notyourfault #greatjob

“@americanair: @ogb4 Our aplogies again for the delay, Marvin. We now show an ETD of 1235p.”<-- time for the 3rd ETD. People are unloading?

“@americanair: @ogb4 Our aplogies again for the delay, Marvin. We now show an ETD of 1235p.” Free 1 way ticket? Should be landing rt now.

@americanair I'll be happy to answer with no profanity when your performance doesn't warrant it. Flight #310 DfW-Jax. Get on the ball!!!!!

@sidebetsapp -If my old lady tells me you shorted me the c-note, I'm feeding you to my Chinchilla when I get out. pic.twitter.com/JKMVjhXh

@nilooom. How 'bout that??? pic.twitter.com/r3q13tnD

I would totally let @evilhag have my babies as long as they answered every question like she just did on the @late_show. Amaze-balls funny.

@mickeyavalon is about to f around & get famous y'all.....Now THAT is an album. #wow #Loaded. #teamjanefonda4lyfe

“@sarahclark1021 @heyitshigbe : He's cleaning his office.."<--- Ace that douche, Frances. No one's office should EVER look like that.

“@sarahclark1021: Shanna wright is on twitter...follow her, she is super awesome”<---OGB @ the OTB w/ not 1, not 2, but 3 short, fat, sluts!

Getting tagged in someone else's Facebook photo from 1991 definitively proves that Karma is real. And blind.

When deaf dudes get drunk, do girls sound hotter?

“@friedriceblog: @ogb4 11-11-11 BOOM! #DirtNasty<-1drink courvosier; 2 drink vodka straight; 3 drink in the sink, yacking on my br new mink!