I never thought Spiderman comics were true until I discovered New York is a real city.

Although Osama is dead, the ultimate solution for world peace is to discard religion and all other superstitious beliefs.

If my mother ever discovered the dirty tweets that I post, she'd make me wash my phone out with soap.

Without the nipples, tits would be pointless.

Irony is liberated black American slaves settling in Africa, then enslaving the local black people, and still naming the country Liberia.

My timeline is full of junk food for thought.

The fact that we have not been contacted by extraterrestrial life forms proves there is intelligent life in the universe.

Blank tweets have no character.

The day has just broken. Now to put the pieces back together.

Westerners watching the looters in Tunisia are learning of the more practical uses of the Burqa.

I redefine teapot. I smoke weed while taking my tea.

To be politically correct, rappers should start using 'slave' in place of 'nigga'.

Bono's activism is actually pro Bono, not pro bono.

RT @chriscr10571: Never die a virgin, when you get to heaven they make you fuck a suicide bomber.

Favstar needs a purgatory to its leaderboard heaven so that if you aim for the stars and miss, you at least land a consolation.

If I were a woman, I wouldn't want to search google translate for the Swahili word for 'Stupidity'.

As white people in Europe die from overdoing drugs, black people in Africa are dying due to lack of drugs.

There is no free lunch, so I'm waiting for supper.

We must question the logic of an all-knowing all-powerful god,who creates faulty humans & then blames em for his own mistakes.-G Roddenberry

I experience rapture every time I smoke weed.