@kencurtin 8yr old son of a friend said today, in amazement, "a man can be president"? Brilliant!

RT @_inno: When http://t.co/WlmNibMV dies, his name will legally be changed to Well.He.Was #TheVoice

RT @cdasilva: [possibly one of the best photos I've seen] - An old dog enjoying the sunset. http://t.co/ZNIxdNkj >> Look @simonbishop

@itstheknitwits #WoollyWednesday I knitted a slightly ridiculous TARDIS pic.twitter.com/fbbiSliz6c

@jessicasmiling Maybe their dicks need a hug?

RT @ladyfuckwit: Being popular on twitter is like sitting at the cool table in a mental institution << Haha, how true ;)

@tomdoohan There's a chap drinks in my local. Has a beard! But his name is John. Is it him?

I had my appendix removed the day Elvis died. #lametofame

@trudski2012 #Bacon the USSR?

No lamppost was safe from him GEORGE FORMBY FOR THE WIN

People who say twitter is for morons, don't folow the right morons.

@yer_actualgtc You have me at it now - playing Tea for the Tillerman. Brilliant album.

There is a legal system to prove whether somebody is guilty. It is not called Twitter.

I've knitted most of this fuelled by wine. Wine is good for knitting ;-) pic.twitter.com/zGgQPpOTOB

@ladyfuckwit Same here. It's extremely upsetting.

@chrabo123 @stepall @heathyvonne @kencampion @rainingcatz @honey_firefly @tarawuski Well done all and thanks for great quiz!

Why did they take cookery (home economics, whatever) out of schools? There would be less need for ready meals if people could cook.

Dear St Valentine. Please fuck off. Thank you.

My mother is having her knee replaced today. I'm hoping it will be replaced with a dog.

@shoegazer41 #SmokingCelebs David Lee Rothman