@paolomac's (Paolo Mac) recent favourites. See who @paolomac favs the most...
Not sure what bums me out more. That @jetlabels uses my tweets as his own or that, after doing so, he only has 12 followers.
Filling out my Census form. I have to list every person who lives in my home for a majority of the time. What's your mother's name, again?
For the record: a computer on its deathbed just wishes it could keep working. Family means nothing to these bastards.
I've been married a long time, but I bet first dates are still the same. Lots of awkward arguments about Reaganomics.
Note to self: hard to manage the todo list when you're avoiding the top ones; either deal with it, or don't bother recording them
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Saint Valentine was eventually imprisoned, beaten, stoned, and beheaded. They don't tell you that on the cards.
"Why do you look at the notes that is in your brother's hand, but do not notice the telemprompter that is in your own eye?
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Obama writes this on his hand: "Look at left teleprompter. Look at right teleprompter. Blame Bush"
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Whew! Been researching polynomially-divided solutions of bipartite self-differential functional equations. Just kidding, I was watching TV.
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My uncle died in a "human cannonball" accident. My aunt says it's going to be tough finding another man of his caliber.
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Toyota Recall? More like Toyotal Recall, am I right?
You get it? Like "Total Recall"? As in the movie? And like the current event?
Anyone?
You get it? Like "Total Recall"? As in the movie? And like the current event?
Anyone?
My Twitter pgm says "1 day ago" for all tweets, so I guess I'm living in the future. It's fine here! It's perfectly OH MY GOD THE SUN SO BRI
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