If you're one of three dudes touching your cock heads together, you my friend are in a "pickle jar".

I bet Roger Ebert's giving hell a thumbs down.

How can I represent, "not wiping well", on my family's coat of arms?

Went to an Afghan restaurant tonight that served goat penis, I couldn't finish it all so I had to take a little penis home with me.

Just imagine how good they would be at karate if they could open their eyes all the way.

Once my dad caught me fucking a dog, so he took me behind the barn and made me fuck a whole pack of dogs.

Is Army Strong stronger than Retard Strong?

I bet Wonder Woman was a squirter.

Black Friday? Don't they already get February?

Having lunch with my in-laws, and their whore daughter.

Last minute costume idea for black guys, put on a track suit...BAM! You're the guy banging my sister.

EVERYONE in the Middle East has a hairy dick.

Embarrassingly, I'm an undecided voter, where do the candidates stand on how many jet skis the dick across the street from me can own?

@rawls "It's Don Strock to TE Jim Jensen who laterals to Rony Seikaly for the dunk."

Pat, I'd like to solve the puzzle. Is it "Retard Gangbang"?

Double Anal is the new 40.

The wife and I tried anal sex last night, I'll never do that again, now her dildo smells funny and my asshole is still sort of bleeding.

Sometimes I feel a little guilty that I drink during lunch and hate-bate it in the parking lot before I go back to work.

That flour was the whitest thing to be on Kim Kardashian in years.

Went to a restaurant where they actually kill the chicken right at your table, incredible, then we enjoyed our steak dinners.