Men don't grow beards. Beards grow men.

-EILTWEET- Kennt jemand von euch gute/billige Hostels etc. in Berlin? WICHTIG! -EILTWEET-

Kony 90210

@svantespeak Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

@chaosfabrik http://t.co/4xU4mwCH

It's not even like I play like hardcore, I just have the tendency to break everything around me.

That's it. I want a porn star called Vicky Leaks. NOW!

Whenever someone says 'omg German is such a harsh language' i say something in the language of Mordor and then they think I'm weird.

@spazzbronson That's the spirit! Nichts ist schoener als einem zombified Ex das Hirn wegzupusten.

@chaosfabrik http://t.co/OFIbCZY2

Der @electru war schon als Kind cool --- http://t.co/Iyk0brFM

@electru Oh, und alles Gute Baby ;)

Me:'Wanna see a magic trick? See this carrot?'
*breaks carrot in half*
Cat:'OMG THERE'S TWO ORANGE STICKS NOW HOW THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT?!

People whose favourite music genre is 'everything' are suspicious and I don't trust them.

@chaosfabrik http://t.co/KTTmibjB

'Ich bin ein Pirat!' - '.. warst du überhaupt schon mal auf einem Schiff?' - 'Ich bin mal in die Elbe gefallen..'

@spazzbronson (Aber ich musste nachschauen welche Pokémon es im Happy Meal gab..)

@spazzbronson (Ich erschlug gestern im McD fast ein 7-jähriges Mädchen mit meinem Rucksack.

@mllelila Totemo oishi. Meine fresse :D

99.9% of the mass is concentrated in 0.01% of the volume. OCCUPY ATOM.