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@peterfitzwel's (Kevin) most faved Tweets...
peterfitzwel
I'm only two women short of a threesome.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
I never talk to myself. Good. Neither do I. Where's the coffee? I don't know.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
In school we learn the lessons before we take the test. In life we take the test before we learn the lesson.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
I just harvested my crops, killed a Mafia Don, fed my fish and deleted my Facebook account.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
4 out of 5 voices in my head say “Keep drinking"
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
I found out why my eyes always burn during sex. It's the mace.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
If nothing is impossible and I'm doing nothing. Then I'm doing the impossible.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
9 out of 10 people agree that out of 10 people 1 will disagree with the other 9.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
You know, for as long as I can remember, I've had memories.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
My favorite blend of coffee is Irish.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
Does this 'chubby' make me look fat?
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
Look at me. Now look away. Look at me. Now look away. Look at me again. Now star this tweet.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
Love gets in the way of the important things in life. Like being left alone.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
Note to self: Stop writing yourself notes.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
Damn, no stalking today. Footprints are easily detected in the snow.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
Apparently just wearing a snuggie on casual Friday is unacceptable.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
Getting laid is the new black.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
It only seems kinky the first time.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
I'm all grown up, and still fascinated with nipples.
@peterfitzwel
peterfitzwel
The problem with your face is that it looks like you.
@peterfitzwel
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