@piercedbrat's (pierced brat ©) most faved Tweets...
made an amazingly realistic origami vagina. in completely unrelated news, i have a severe paper cut on my penis.
girlfriend upset over text i sent saying i didn't love her anymore and it was over. i told her not to worry, it was meant for someone else.
why do obese people drive the smallest cars available and how come they don't pass out after dispacing all the air in the car?
i think my granny meant "condo" when she said she enjoyed two wonderful weeks in a condom in majorca.
technically it's not stealing if i put my neighbour's underwear back on her washing line once i've worn it.
isn't it embarrassing when you walk past someone as a snowflake falls in your eye and you involuntarily wink at them...
and grab their bum.
and grab their bum.
she had a pair of cherries tattooed on each buttock.
i didn't know whether to hold, nudge or go for the jackpot.
i didn't know whether to hold, nudge or go for the jackpot.
the rule about getting into a stranger's car who offers to show you their puppies still applies as an adult - no matter how pretty they are.
one of santa's little helpers at the mall looked a bit depressed today, i think he must have low elf esteem.
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