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Kimmel: "You once shot a coyote while jogging."
Gov. Perry: "True."
Kimmel: "You jog with a gun?"
Perry: "I do interviews with a gun."
Obama wins NH, meaning Romney loses his birth state, home state, and 1 of 2 vacation home states. When he loses CA, it will be a sweep.
The Five Stages of Winter:
Colbert to Bill O'Reilly: "Bill, with all due respect, you're an idiot."
Letterman: "Putin claims he did not invade Crimea. Really? Are those tanks part of a traffic study?"
Seth Meyers: "The Olympics are over, so for the next 4 years if you go skiing with a rifle on your back, you're just a crazy person."
So Snowden asks Putin if he spies on Russian citizens. Big deal. Why doesn't Snowden hack Putin's computers & find out?
Jimmy Fallon: "The French call it Mardi Gras. John Travolta calls it Mardell Grazeen."
Colbert: "The athletes are leaving the Olympics before Putin burns Sochi for the insurance money."
In reality, we can no more kick Russia out of its base in Crimea than Russia can kick us out of our base at Guantanamo.
Chief Political Columnist for Politico: Sometimes in error, but never in doubt.