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Friends: 167
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@rachijan's (rachel) most faved Tweets...
rachijan
Sis and I hugged g'night. She said 'you smell nice' but it sorta sounded a bit like 'you could TOTALLY get away with not showering tomorrow'
@rachijan
rachijan
Roommate's friend: "do you live here?"

Me: "No. I just come over and wash the dishes.

In my underwear."
@rachijan
rachijan
About to walk through Harlem in my Jackson 4 shirt. If I get murdered, remember that I loved you.
@rachijan
rachijan
Last night I dreamed I had a 40 star tweet.

Apparently I'm a lot more entertaining in my sleep.
@rachijan
rachijan
Sister just found out about the [redacted] which means I have approximately 7 seconds to tell Mom first.
@rachijan
rachijan
From asleep to showered and out the door in 13 minutes doesn't make up for the hour I overslept. But 13 minutes? Time to update the resume.
@rachijan
rachijan
spent 20 minutes in painful conversation with someone i cant stand in order to avoid being introduced to more people i'm bound not to like.
@rachijan
rachijan
Sometimes a new bra is almost as good as a new set of boobs.

And always always cheaper.
@rachijan
rachijan
Seriously considering going to work in the clothes I wore yesterday & slept in last night.

jk that would be gross.

I'll change my shirt.
@rachijan
rachijan
my sister and i are on opposite sides of a queen size bed talking via fb chat. if being introverted is a game i just leveled up.
@rachijan
rachijan
I just listened to a Coldplay song.

And I liked it.

Anyone know the other three horsemen of the apocalypse?
@rachijan
rachijan
1998 called. He said he's sorry he even gave you that GAP Dream perfume to begin with and would you just Please. Stop. Wearing it.
@rachijan
rachijan
There's a good chance I'm not making it home awake tonight. Good thing this car has auto-pilot.

Wait.

What?
@rachijan
16
Alter_edtracilynssmashedpotatoesCranberryPersonyonesygunthergreenBlue_CrabRtrCisco89BeauBockkarinainklosangelesdjMODATwitsdomRainbowEclipseomarsawolfsleepndad
rachijan
My mom's argument of 'I've been driving a lot longer than you have' is an insensitive response to 'HOLY CRAP WE'RE GONNA DIE'
@rachijan
15
drewmongejustmeeagainnBlue_CrabtammyphinneybobthecowSHORTYJOYLieseTheGingertracilynsBeauBockkarinainkMODATwitsdomiamyoushouldtooDeconileKarenLyneButler
rachijan
i'm building a fort in the living room with a sign that says 'nobody else allowed' and i'm moving into it. forever.
@rachijan
15
bumpcrudCranberryPersonbobthecowtracilynsyonesyLieseTheGingerBlue_CrabRtrCisco89GravyBarbieBeauBockkarinainkMODATwitsdomRainbowEclipserachijan
rachijan
In no particular order these are the things I will NOT miss about New York City.

1. Hobo pee
@rachijan
14
sarkastickuntyonesybobthecowJeeNeeBeesmashedpotatoesDavedebruyneUncleDynamitesnydRtrCisco89BeauBockkarinainktimbalancedMODATwitsdom
rachijan
Turns out not many people are amused by an adult with a giant helium balloon singing Simon & Garfunkel songs in the elevator.


Go figure.
@rachijan
14
offdutygnomeyonesydrfindleysmashedpotatoestracilynsDavedebruynereverendrossBlue_CrabRtrCisco89BeauBockkarinainkMODATtikilovegodKarenLyneButler
rachijan
Also, everyone ought to wish a Happy Deportation Day to the Swiss girl that's been squatting in my living room.
@rachijan
13
tracilynsYayaatype3fiendyonesybobthecowsmashedpotatoesnavanaxUncleDynamiteRtrCisco89BeauBockkarinainkMODATKarenLyneButler
rachijan
Just driving up and down and up and down up and down and up and down the street.

As cruisually.
@rachijan
13
bumpcrudlivejamieCapsaholicLieseTheGingeryonesysmashedpotatoesshanalizzyRtrCisco89MommyNeedsANapBeauBockkarinainkMODATwitsdom
rachijan
listening to nothing but U2 for the next two weeks, for the sake of art. either i'll end up with an amazing project, or slits in my wrists.
@rachijan
12
smashedpotatoessnydTrick_or_tweetRtrCisco89drewmongeyonesyLieseTheGinger1surlygurlBeauBockkarinainkMODATwitsdom
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