@raiselm's (rhymes with hazel) most faved Tweets...
In my defense, the only reason I wang chunged tonight was because I was told everyone else was doing it.
Hi my name is RaiselM, I like bacon, donuts and burritos. I have Twitter Addiction with Favestar OCD. Is there any coffee?
First you sort the M&Ms by color, then eat colors from greatest to least quantity. Because *that's* how my OCD works.
If I die here at this Scrabble board, I just want the record to show that I scored over 90 points for Qualm
Facebook just recommended a high school friend's father as my friend. I'm gonna hang out here at the cool kids table and drink to forget.
Pro-Tip: distribute candy wrappers in trashcans throughout the house. This way there is not enough evidence to incriminate.
Just checked on sleeping kids. 8's PJ pants were on floor next to his bed. This is all your fault, Twitter.
NO Facebook, I do not want to start a farm or become a Mafia boss. When you have an app that will deliver donuts to me, we'll talk.
I'm wearing my new glasses today. I hope I don't make a spectacle of myself.
<crickets>
I'll go un-follow myself now.
<crickets>
I'll go un-follow myself now.
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