Most folks believe if they can describe a job that they can do it. Most folks are wrong.

Meeting rule #27: if more than half the people in the room have their laptops open, it's not a meeting.

My favorite part of a bad mood is my lower tolerance for incompetence.

If you don't keep a puzzle squarely in front of your nerd, they'll go make/find their own. #fairwarning

Engineers aren't bitter -- they're informed.

I once wrote a book report about a book that did not exist. #gotawaywithit

Guerilla personality test: on a PostIt, make a list of three things that make you irrational/psychotic. Now, eat the PostIt.