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"Baby, I love you so much that if Joss Whedon was writing our romance, one of us would be dead." #nerdypickuplines #truthbombs
The first person to get "No admittance except on party business" as a tramp stamp will be my fucking hero forever.
Me: "What book did you borrow from me?" Ayden: "Um…Space Cowboy Diner Food." Me: "…Cowboy Feng's Space Bar and Grille?" Her: "Yes, that."
When you're dating a barista, the hardest part of breaking up is Folger's in your cup.
I'm just not entirely convinced that putting pizza toppings on a bagel makes them easier or more suited to eating at more times of the day.
Watching LAPD at #OccupyLA eviction tell the press to leave, could only stay if they had a special LAPD press pass. This is not my US.
"A cat with a laser pointer is a giddy thing." - William Shakespeare.
Yo momma's so fat, her patronus is a cake. #WizardJokes
No, that's fine, Microsoft. I didn't want to use Twitter today anyway.
"Griffiths was considered for the part of the Doctor in Doctor Who following Tom Baker's departure in 1981." THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN PERFECT.
My roller derby name is Higg's Bosom.
Turns out @themongreljews show in Corvallis was recorded! Download here: http://fireworkscorvallis.com/musicarchives/The_Mongrel_Jews_Live_at_FireWorks_031413.mp3 …
Musicians aren't self-centered, okay? They're just really focused on their brand.