@kark4news he's a coach...and a good one! Not a life coach! Who cares what he's doing on the side.

@sbellelauren pooping without your phone is being Amish....

my roots are so bad that if asked if the carpet matches the curtains, my answer is "no, but it does match the valance"

Please RT @sbellelauren Oden/Pencil Bluff VFD 334 Brushy Rd Oden, AR 71961. Send a card if you can. Took care of mine on Xmas day.

Thank you @stevehuff and @sbellelauren and @samgrittner for making me laugh REALLY hard sometimes this year. No better present can be given.

why do we have to re-remember how to put on a jacket over a sweatshirt every single year. "Hold the sleeve while inserting arm"...

@rickygervais God did. He and the Westboro church hate gay people and stopped Twitter from talking about love. Yep.

@stevehuff A tornado large enough to have a discernible "eye". Even for those of us in the South......THIS is frightening.

Thoughts and candles lit from all of us in "tornado alley" for the folks near Cleburne, TX. Kim in Arkansas.

@stevehuff Sometimes when someone farts, people say "Jeezus Christ" Does that count?

@ivankailic @jovanailic90 Read the book. It is WAY better. Even though the movie is VERY good.

@wiselogel @kenjennings Thank you, Nick. Been reclining on that knowledge for years now....

@stevehuff This.....I like this.

Was I the only one who thought Jonathan Winters was already dead? I mean I'm sad and all......just had already done my grieving I guess.

@zennajaidman @samgrittner back off girl. He's MINE!! Oh wait. I'm already married.

@bpfox @stevehuff addendum to said rule: at least one person will be offended

@jaret2113 what is "2113" for y'all? I know what 1031 means for me....I assume 2113 means something...

@stevehuff Husband added Eurythmics to said suit

@stevehuff And ELO and Heart. Maybe a class action suit?

@stevehuff there goes Steve bitching again....and on twitter of all places.