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NASA JPL is coordinating communications between three spacecraft on another fucking planet and the delay is only 15 minutes. NBC, your move.
I fought the blah and the blah won.
Maybe some hot coffee will make today suck less. Even if I have to throw it on some bitch to make that happen.
This dog, I swear. He's like an angel sent from heaven. Angels eat their own shit, right?
Bourbon is the American shouting, "Imma get you DRUNK!" Irish whiskey ploys you with that sweet accent 'til you're naked before you know it.
Pol. views? I don't always agree with the Democrats, but I can't get my head NEARLY far enough up my ass to see eye-to-eye with Republicans.
I wish I was as motivated to work out as I am to stare at people who do.
"Dick dick douche" is the new "Duck duck goose". Pass it on.
"Happy, happy, joy, joy! Happy, happy, joy, joy!" And THIS is what happens when we finally get some goddamned sun... And maybe a little rum.
"Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma!…" I don't even know how you're not murderers, all of you. Happy Mother's Day.
Did you know: In cultures where they have no word for "asshole" they just say "guy in a dodge ram".
Tech & bike fiend. I drink a lot. And swear. Don't take this shit seriously or I will cut you. (Bonus inanity, outrage, and back-channel chatter at @redrummee.)