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Okay, I think I'm about drunk enough to vote now.
I prefer to think people using e-cigarettes are playing whimsical tunes on little futuristic pipes rather that sating chemical dependency.
If an extraterrestrial asked me to take it to my leader, we'd discuss the flaws of representative democracy before locating Jarvis Cocker.
Find the book nearest you right now. Turn to page 56. Read the fifth sentence. Write it in blood on a street-facing window. Sit and wait.
New drinking game: saturate the population with warped and unattainable aspirations and watch them drink themselves to depression and death.
♪I'm so dizzy my head is spinning, like an inner ear problem that immobilises me for months on statutory sick pay. And it's you girl...♪
I'm bored of wanting an iPhone 6. I want an iPhone 7.
Matthew McConaughey, hey, hey man, stop speaking without a script.
Just caught the number 69 bus, if you know what I mean (I'm going to Rotherham).
Person in Sheffield who does stand up and runs @square_hole comedy.
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