My niece has taught me far more than I need to know about the band One Direction.

Dear Mother Nature, please stop trying to wipe Australia off the map. Love Rove.

Dear pancakes, thank you for making it acceptable to eat ice cream for breakfast. Love Rove.

RT @funnyordie: If massaging a pug is wrong, this cat doesn't want to be right: http://t.co/1IA1XvPS

Thank you @calbo for the new greatest thing I've ever seen RT @pip1984 If you own a cat...your new aim in life pic.twitter.com/mwlnwweQyo”

Now THIS is fun: Go to Google Maps, get directions, put Japan as start location and China as end location. Now read direction 43. Enjoy.

Just re-watched #DoctorWho episode 'Blink'. Still so very very good some 4 years later. Bravo @steven_moffat.

Seriously though...say hi to your mum for me #mothersday

Quick, Australia! While no one is running the place - STEAL AS MUCH AS YOU CAN!

Sure, we can put man on the moon & watch tv on our phones but can't make envelope glue taste any better. Lift your game, human race!

A toast! To tonight's #RoveLA on @fox8tv with @benjaminmadden @joelmadden @caseyrosewilson & @ericstonestreet. Cheers!  http://say.ly/duS4n11 

RT @lehmo23 I can only guess that somewhere in an African jungle Joseph Kony is explaining to his son the evils of masturbating in public.

My vote would be "Ow. Why won't this let go of my eyes?" RT @mamamia: Do NOT watch this video (But you probably should) http://t.co/uhUZrUGS

RT @spinafekt The girl married her Prince. The bad guy is dead. It's a real Disney weekend here on Earth! (via @meshel_laurie)

For those who missed me on @jayleno last night, here it is in internet form: Part A http://bit.ly/gTrNW3 and B http://bit.ly/i4aW6c

I saw a guy today wearing RealD 3D glasses as sunnies. The world must have looked so real to him it must have felt like he could touch it.

Take THAT evolution! RT @funnyordie TV reporter walks into a pole on live TV: http://t.co/xlJbxL6e

At a bar with @kumailn trying to explain cricket to Americans. It's a far tougher job than it should be.

Really hoping the search for a new Pope includes some kind of Hunger Games-style tournament.

Adele is pregnant. Seems she was rolling a little further in the deep than we thought.