Damn it feels good to be a
ＣＯＯＬ
ＲＡＮＣＨ
ＤＯＲＩＴＯ
A real
ＤＯＲＩＴＯ-ＡＳＳ
ＣＯＲＮ
ＣＨＩＰ
Plays his cards right
A real
ＴＡＣＯ
ＦＬＡＶＯＲ
never run his fuckin mouth

left a window open & a bird got into my apartment. it's a condor. wingspan is like twelve feet. hittin it with a magazine. bird don't care.

DANCE like nobody's watching. SCREAM like no one can hear you. PEEL YOUR SKIN OFF like it doesn't hurt. EAT YOUR OWN EYES like you're on PCP

The audience titters. Wicked Oprah screams "YOU GET CATARACTS AND YOU GET CATARACTS AND YOU GET CATARACTS!" as their eyes turn milky white.

There's a popular massively multiplayer online role playing game where you tell a bunch of people how bad you feel & hope they favorite it.

"Is Pepsi okay?" said the server making $2.50 an hour plus tips. "Is Monopoly money okay?!" said the asshole brainwashed by brand identity.

Isn't it weird how we PARK on DRIVEways & the world is falling apart around us & there's literally nothing we can do but watch & laugh & die

i have an angel on one shoulder saying "post nonsense" and a devil on the other telling me "say something stupid" and they're also fucking

We Bought A Zoo 2: My Kid Shot A Cop

When I die, please throw my ashes in my dad's face, then tell him unions are good and communism will eventually win. Thanks.

lmfao tim tebow is a fucking reptilian you people are idiots when he take a knee he just gettin closer to snakes to make plans and shit lol

If you can't handle me at my worst then you don't deserve me at my other, even worse worst.

let's talk about sex baby / let's talk about you & me / the de facto assumption should be "no," not "yes" / since humans have a-gen-cy

NEW! Starbucks Doritos Loco Mochachino Nacho Salted Caramel Cinnachip Cool Ranch Whipped Vanilla Taco Choco Key Lime Mango Espresso Frappe

RT if your entire life is a joke. RT if you can barely get out of bed due to despair. RT if you sabotage yourself. RT IF YOU LOVE CHOCOLATE!

No matter how much you struggle nothing changes the fact that it's 9/9/99 & we're all being simulated on the first production Sega Dreamcast

a creeping fractal horror greets you and greets you and greets you and greets you and greets you and greets you and greets you and greets yo

#free #website #design #for #all #seo #and #social #media #marketing #needs #buy #my #services #ill #become #real #escape #virtual #prison

An obelisk walks into a bar and says ＴＲＥＭＢＬＥ  ＢＥＦＯＲＥ  ＭＥ  ＡＮＤ  ＬＥＴ  ＭＹ  ＤＥＡＦＥＮＩＮＧ  ＨＵＭ  ＲＵＩＮ  ＹＯＵＲ  ＦＥＥＢＬＥ  ＭＩＮＤＳ.

hey y'all, this saga is the best thing i did this week. http://t.co/xVCQM5wJ http://t.co/qxCh2MaG http://t.co/sFFrQtuQ pray for me. #iced