Don't try to explain yourself to stupid people. You're not stupid, remember? Or are you?

I hate having a lot of imaginary friends because I always have to pay for the beers.

In hell, for your birthday, they give you socks in an iPhone 5 box.

RT if you were born because your parents had sex

RT if you're a dinasaur

RT if you weren't invited to your parents wedding.

RT if you like big butts and you can not lie.

RT if you're mermaid

I'm responsible for what I do, not for what people say I do.

It doesn't matter how ugly, weird, big nose, short or stupid you are, if you can make a woman laugh, she's yours forever.

Twitter is my serious account, the funny one is my bank account.

RT if you're Chewbacca

— Could you close the window please, it's cold.
— Sure, *Alt + F4*.

Behind silence, there is a hidden love.

Don't tell me you miss me, tell me at what time you're coming over.

For a person you love to appreciate you, you have to prove to them you're also able of stop loving them and of moving on.

If you're not in my future I'm coming back.

Only love can make us do stupid shit like waiting for someone to change like if we're gonna live forever.

This having to wake up every morning and doing real life grown up shit is some bullshit.

Don't attack others when the war is against yourself.