Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
The next episode of Mythbusters will refute everything I've ever said to women in a bar.
So I was hanging out with some friends the other night and ... alright ... just kidding ... I don't really have any friends.
Nepotism: Hollywood is full of family success stories, yet, there is no Gabe Ruth, Morris Kasparov, or Kristina Navratilova.
You know that the point of fantasy sports is to maximize the number of commercials you watch, right?
Stoned doctors should open a clinic and call it High Heals.
"All my ex's are total jerks." ~Someone about to date another jerk.
Bud Lite Platinum? Seems like you could throw in another 5 cents and get real beer.
In a future virtual world, if you like someone, you can just drag them on top of you and release.
"Been there, discovered that." ~Marco Polo.
Rest assured that your long-distance BF/GF is about to do it with someone else when s/he says: "I can't wait to have sex with you!"
Kenny A through F never sold a single record.
Doctor: Are you sexually active?
Her: I usually just lay there and let him do all the work.
What a man needs to commit to monogamy: a leash and a choke collar.
To secure a job as a guard at Buckingham Palace one must maintain a stationary ass during the album version of Disco Inferno.
I learned everything I know about chivalry by taking knight classes.
The wife just said she wanted to have sex! Then she got in the car and drove away ...
Shouldn't the phrase "scarred for life" be shortened to just "scarred"? Can you be scarred for 7 years then paroled after 3?
"I like all butts and I cannot lie." ~Proctologists, probably.
Isn't it pronounced "morning thickness"?