"Bring my your sick, tired, ancient, and foreigners!" - my bus driver

@bowtruss just made a new best friend. They donated a lb of coffee for our java stout #homebrew. @melodramedian and myself thank you!

Its remarkable how a bad day can suddenly be turned into a good/productive day after just half a cup of coffee.

Let's fucking do this, bulls.

Phil Hansen: Embrace the shake  http://on.ted.com/aaAO  #TED  http://on.ted.com/aaAO 

@ashokrao95 your brief twitter battle w/ @umairh is entertaining. i dont understand him at all. i think he is on to something but he is...

It would be so much easier if idiots came visibly labeled every day instead of just once a year.

@highway_30 IMO, you give docs too much credit. Anyone can go in and get diagnosed with any # of mental disorders. It's called being #human

@romequaggans bullllllshiiiiiit

On an unrelated note, $1 samosas and $2 falafel sandwiches in the LSB have a drastic and probably fleeting impact on my view of Islam.

Islam has such a beautiful culture and they are such a kind and loving people.

There are very few things that garlic doesn't make better.

@pjdiaries the picture on ESPN of him cringing while being carried off the field literally makes me want to cry.

holy shit leo looks like a stud on the front of this month's GQ.

@daniellavintika your strange and unreasonable fear of grasshoppers is hysterical. Just get
me in the doors!

@irabrooker http://t.co/hBFyruB

Paying a credit card with another credit card. Like a boss. #likeaboss

Song of the day: blood bank by Bon Iver

To whoever left his ugly sweater at my place 2 years ago: dont think i ever told u its here, but u have 3 days to come get it b4 garbage day

"England, we will see your wedding and raise you a funeral!" --saw it on my mom's FB first. She couldn't have been the originator though.