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The only good thing about "I Love the Nightlife" is you can sing most of it while gargling mouthwash.
"So I listened to this Daft Punk album once while browsing the web. I will now unveil my critique" --the Internet, 5/13/13
Cool that you guys like the new Daft Punk album but please note that it killed Dr. Joyce Brothers.
Whenever I see a hot girl at a bus stop I always think, she must be a real pain in the ass, because hot girls can usually get a ride.
I listened to David Sedaris read Miranda July's "Roy Spivey" last night, and wow. Hilarious, amazing story. Listen: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/books/2012/11/fiction-podcast-david-sedaris-reads-miranda-july.html …
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO .@nzherald pic.twitter.com/0ryhLFiI4L
Probably gonna die trying to get this ingrown vagina hair out - my waxer is Katia & she works in Princeton. Avenge me.
89% of these Oklahoma City Thunder crowd T-shirts will one day be wrapped around a piping hot beaker of meth.
Drove super far to a movie, had the time wrong. Manager gave me a comp ticket, stranger paid for my parking, and sbux gave me half off.
I used to go see Chris Christie & the Lap Band at the Stone Pony in Astbury Park. Good times.
Wolf Blitzer, Stone Phillips & Lester Holt's folks gave them porn names but despite that, they persevered & ended up w/ noble TV careers.
Just had kind of a painful sneeze. Why you gotta do me like that, sneeze? When I'm the sort of person who appreciates a good sneeze.
I used to think every human life was precious until I realized there are still community college students who brag about their grades
Whoever put those sudden high notes in Happy Birthday is a real piece of shit.
Edgy as heck.
