It's always the least brightest bulb in the box that I wanna screw

#UnpopularChildrensBooks Clifford the Big Red Ginger

RIP Cher? Cher will never die... she will be reincarnated as a different plastic product. Maybe tupperware.

BREAKING: Howard Stern in talks to replace Piers Morgan as Judge on NBC’s “America’s Got Talent”: $15M/Year http://t.co/RUdACGvM

Apparently Rihanna got THUG LIFE tattooed across her knuckles last night. I guess "CHRIS BROWN'S PUNCHING BAG" was too long.

:: Howard Stern Super Bowl Commercial AMERICA'S GOT TALENT [VIDEO] http://t.co/q3TyV1my

:: Caught On Video: Man Smoking Crack During Rush Hour On the 2 Train in NYC! http://t.co/vup18WxY

:: Team America - Kim Jong Il Lonely Song [VIDEO] #RIPKimJongIl http://t.co/DV4Mb3Mh

Someone should make a song called: "Parisians in Niger."

I HOPE THE @HP CEO TAKES OVER FOR APPLE SO WE CAN GET $100 iPADS!

if u're brad pitt, wtf is the point of marrying Angelina at this point? unless she been saving that butt-hymen for marriage..

@DJPaulyD don't forget the cats there were in the corner from day one ;)

:: Here's Why Rap Radar's Twitter Accounts Keep Getting Shut Down http://t.co/aQ8sTrgC

The next season of Jersey Shore should take place on an Italian cruise ship... #GTL #GetTheLifeboat

#RIP --> Etta James, Joe Paterno, Sarah Burke, SOPA, Mega Upload, Seal and Heidi Klum's Marriage, and most importantly, Kobe's 75 Million.

The sluttiest girls are always the first ones to get engaged

:: Christina Aguilera's Period Blood Runs Down Leg at Etta James Funeral, Tampon Comes Out [SHOCK PICS] http://t.co/lfWDqMWS

If you are in line at Walmart right now, I hope you find a half off deal on some #killyoself medicine.

:: BREAKING VIDEO: Benjy Bronk of Howard Stern Show At Weiner Press Conference: "Were You Fully Erect?" http://j.mp/iwGzY7

White people at the Derby, Hispanics at Cinco de Mayo, Black people at The Mayweather fight, Emo kids at the Free Comic Book day... #win