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I would eat turkey more often if on the package somewhere it indicated that it contains jive.
Do people still fight for their right to party? Or is it just a heated debate these days?
I'm thankful that rappers remind me they do it big. I'd hate to think of a hip hop star doing it medium. So sad.
I'm starting to suspect that the rap game does not need me and is actually indifferent to my presence.
I think you're being a little too presumptuous with the "We'll see you tomorrow" slogan Applebee's. Let's check that ego there champ.
Is it rude to slap someone in the face for chewing with their mouth open? Answer quickly because I need to know why this guy looks pissed.
Remember how in the intro to reading rainbow the lady singing said she could fly twice as high as a butterfly? She never proved it. Wtf.*
I'm completely cool with the touch and the feel of cotton but I'm not willing to refer to it as the fabric of my life.
Sometimes I can't decide whether I want to watch Beaches or Steele Magnolias and then I remember I have a penis.
If I do a little dance but don't make a little love am I still eligible to get down tonight?
Look, if you want to describe them as lumps then I'm just not sure they're that lovely.
Saying "I want you inside me." might seem weird to you but I feel like pizza and I have that type of relationship.
I'm like a fine wine in a sense that if you have too much of me you might vomit.
I just overheard a man reference his penis as a "pah jay jay". Please, somebody stop this.
Saw a dude with Velcro shoes and thought he was a hipster but after watching him I'm pretty sure his Mom doesn't trust him with laces.
Sucks so bad that my iPad wont charge. Maybe it's because I don't have the charging cord...or an iPad.
Is anyone else as pissed off as I am that the show Frasier had nothing to do with tossed salad or scrambled eggs?
How can "Your ass is grass and I'm a lawn mower" be considered threatening? To me that's just a statement that you want to shave some butt.
Easy there guy wearing a trench coat. I don't think September is ready for all that bad assery.
A subtle hint of awesome sprinkled with hilarious. Vintage 1982. Enjoy.