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@firstdatehell He wouldn't let me get out of the car until I finished listening to a SimplyRed song. He reached across & held the door shut.
@firstdatehell The guy unexpectedly jumped off a wall to impress me & broke his ankle. He then told people for years that I'd pushed him.
@rhodri A guy took me to his family barbecue on a date. His big dog immediately sniffed my crotch & his dad said - just like my son hey boy?
Blushing is not cute. It's a horrible, embarrassing curse. I wish they'd invent a cure other than wearing a mask or dying.
Just saw a recipe claiming to be a great use for "leftover cake". What is this "leftover cake" of which they speak? Urinal cake? Has to be.
For the last time. If you eat fish, you are NOT a vegetarian. Last I checked, fish were neither fruit nor vegetables. You complete morons.
Registered as an organ donor. Play your cards right, and you could some day be the owner of my extremely sexy corneas.
Pathetic as it is, being asked "Are you a model?" even as an obvious pickup line still makes me giggle stupidly & fluff my hair out. Heehee!
Who, when they hear a police siren directly outside, thinks, "They've come for me!"? A lot of you, I suspect.
Look upon Kratos, Kitteh of War, ye mortals, and dispair. http://twitpic.com/bddn7v
I didn't even read a single tweet - if you call yourself "Meat Tornado", I will follow you.
Massively expensive "Incan Gold Raw Chocolate Bar". Raw cocoa butter, incan berries, maca, sprouted buckwheat. Tastes, naturally, like shit.
Found a website showing how to make beer & wine soap. Surely the point of soap is so you *don't* smell like an alcoholic in the morning?
A tip you can pass on to anyone you know who sells clothing: Never. Ever. Suggest a woman take a bigger size to try on *just in case*.
About 24 hours until I get my copy of Diablo 3, & I'm starting to get pretty excited. Fellow players, my battle tag is RedBaroness#2437
"They slipped briskly into an intimacy from which they never recovered" - F. Scott Fitzgerald. Like herpes, really.
A facebook dating ad has a pic of a guy wearing a beanie saying "Let me take you out." Is this a dating service for hitmen?
Crunchy on the outside, chewy on the inside. Lover of things noir. Put the lotion in the fucking basket.
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