Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
One day we'll open Twitter & it'll just say:
Thanks for playing! Hope you enjoyed this social experiment. Now apologise to your loved ones.
Licking something to discourage others from stealing it may be how oral sex was invented.
I don't care what you think you saw, if I deleted it, that shit never happened.
~ Twitter Law.
I've done a few things I've been ashamed of, but at least I never played FarmVille.
I can't wait for integrity to be cool again.
Never fuck the same mistake twice.
Telling a depressed person to cheer up is, quite frankly, like telling an amputee to grow an arm.
If it was that easy, they'd have done it.
Things I now know:
Weirdness is endemic.
Laughter is addictive.
Everybody needs someone.
We all have issues.
Love might hurt.
Twitter: Loners, moaners, stoners and boners.
What's that, Lassie? There's a whole population trapped in a social network?
If you retweet someone the exact same time they retweet you, you get pregnant.
Everybody knows that.
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a DM.
Retweeting is saying: I couldn't have said it better myself. Well, maybe I could. But you said it first.
How one woman describes another tells you everything you need to know about the first woman's insecurities.
Sometimes a woman just wants a man to say, 'Shhh,' and then fuck that bad mood out of her.
If only you could Google how someone felt about you.
I read 3 books a week before finding Twitter. I kind of hate you.
I think the term 'unexpected guest' is an oxymoron. I prefer to call them intruders.
If it looks like a whore; tweets like a whore and DMs like a whore?
It's a man.
The tweets become a voice.
The voice becomes a person.
The person becomes a friend.