the uglier the snapchat, the tighter the friendship

blonde hair
>>>>>>>>>>>>
brown hair
✌ ✌ ✌

your hair is not dirty blonde, it's brown. stop

Starbucks, a back massage, and Sour Patch Kids would be perfect about right now. 👌

tomorrow's monday
😥 😫 😒😣😒
😒😒 😒 😒 😲
😩 😢 😲 😪 😠
😒 😒😒 😞 😤
😭 😖 😒😔😒

Oh, so you think you're ugly? You're absolutely right, you are.

Which one is Taylor Swift? pic.twitter.com/msvV1BBVX9

We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control.

*One more shot* = 17 more shots

Don't judge a book by its cover unless the book is a fucking annoying bitch who needs to be high fived in the face with a chair.

Nicki Minaj being a judge on American Idol is like Taylor Swift giving relationship advice.

It's not called being "whipped." It's called respecting your girlfriend.

Take your age. Subtract it by your age. That's how many fucks I give.

When you're driving and Nicki Minaj is on all 3 radio stations at the exact same time, there's nothing left to do except crash your car.

Tell a fucking therapist, Not Facebook.

Boyfri(end). Girlfri(end). Piz(forever)za.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

The problem with Crocs is that people wear them.

How many "I'm alive" posts will I see tomorrow? Hopefully none.