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The minute before you fall in love...stop & look at who you are. Never ever forget that person for anyone.
New beginnings never end.....
Guys should go outside on a windy day, pull their pants down & get a blow job but today it's so windy, they'd get a sex change.
Some people need a daily reminder to remind themselves to remember something.
Monday advice: Bite off more than you can chew at work because that makes you gag and barf....then you get to go home.
Hearts are like crayons......even when they break they still work.
It's "Take your kids to work" day and so many kids are screwed because parents forget to take their fucking brains to work.
Called my Mom to tell her it's pouring rain with high winds today & to take cover because this shit makes houses fall on witches like her.
I'm at that stage in life where the 1st cute kid that comes to my door on Halloween gets all my candy & I cry because I want a baby.
Everyone deserves a pat on the back once in awhile.....well, except for a fucking porcupine.
Straightjackets required. No corners allowed. Love bouncing!
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