Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Based on everything, everything sucks. Pay attention to nothing but label it all with a silly font. Then nap.
roses are red,
my heart is black,
all of you suck,
your best friend is a cat.
1guacamole = 6.0221415×10²³guaca
Life hack: replace lawn with milkshake
I robbed Whole Foods armed with a sandwich bag full of gluten. I didn't even have to use it.
My pornstar name would be Cozy Butthole.
You no know my kung fu. My kung fu do shit you no do. All my kung fu new to you, my kung fu cool like what it do. My kung fu is the shit doo
My timeline a year ago > my timeline now
You people who star everything should really only do it when it deserves one. Because you look just like every other insincere star fucker.
Twitter helps me process. I throw different ideas out there and seeing what gets starred and by whom simplifies internal conflict.
If I can't get laid by my own merit and deceit to people on the internet I deserve to be alone and will marry drugs.
I probably won't start a blog until I stop getting real life pussy or end up in a shitty marriage.
I bet a blog will solve my internet performance issues. But my ego draws the loser line at blog...
I can fake orgasm all over Facebook & not feel anything, like a heroin addicted child sex slave with vaginal nerve damage on xanax.
Twitter is like a girl I fell in love with but unresolved issues gave me dick issues & stopped fucking her because it was insincere.
Twitter used to matter then it didn't and I don't know why. But I always wanted to like it.
It was fun when getting followers & validation mattered. But I always sabotage happiness cuz my superpower is making everything irrelevant.
I apologize to anyone who enjoyed life less because of my absence but my tweets felt forced and I only pander for money or self-gain.
Religion didn't piss me off more than it ever has. Its just Twitter. I just thought of something stupid & expanded on it.
If I could be stupid I would. I could fuck girls with no personality. Anything would make sense.