Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Xanax blackouts are the worst because I do dumb shit but at least I wake up with new stuff.
Can you text a Ghostbuster? If not, I might have to leave..
Life is short. Veins is running out. Make the most if it.
I moved into a vintage Seattle apartment. Basically hella old wood that smells like catpiss. You'd love it.
Sorry Twitter, I slept in this quarter..
I don't mind being that guy at the bus stop... But fuck being that guy on the bus.
You are as useless as a plastic fork
Let's leave orange caps all over this place like bosses...
YOU GIVE ME ICE CREAM WHEN I ASK FOR TUNA!!! FUCK YOUUUUU!!!
Drop it down real low, twerky
I have the best grocery club card. It's called my.pockets
A tv show but where people who get set up have to eat an eighth of shrooms beforehand.
What kind of cars do serial killers drive?
What kind of cars do chickens drive?
What kind of cars do ghosts drive?
Ima fuck that pussy in the butt
An exorcism but when hot nuns tie you up and squirt vaginal holy water in my face.
Spend time with life and the internet gets butthurt.
I woke up. This has to end.