Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Seattle loses to Broncos in Super Bowl. Carroll leaves Seahawks to join high school team. Seahawks forfeit last 3 years of wins.
The 1st thing I do when I wake up is change my clocks to noon. That way I don't feel guilty drinking that early.
Fuck me like I paid the $500 cash upfront.....oh wait
I believe you have the right to abortions until they're at least 25. By then you should know if they're a fuck up or not.
Sunbathing nude in backyard. Wife asked what I was doing. I said warming up your dinner. Didn't work.
Hey cyclists. Want me to share the road? Do the speed limit or drive a fucking car!
Johnny Carson has had so many ex wives. A tonight show joke in Afghanistan.
The clerk asked if I needed a bag while buying condoms. I said naw she ain't that ugly.
I buy my drugs on Sesame Street.
I insult everyone. Rock star wannabe. Still waiting for Van Halen to call.........