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that awkward moment when someone texts you "heyy coming out tonight" and you look up from your youtube videos like "life exists?"
:D Everyone google "let it snow"! And then when it frosts over you can write in it :333
Once I read a twilight fic where Edward sucked on Bella's bloody tampon like a lollipop
HATERS TO THE LEFT, THAT MOVIE WAS INCREDIBLE
I'M SO GLAD I DON'T GET ERECTIONS. HOW FUCKING AWKWARD
i just hope he's read a half-way good one and not like ... bubble-wrap sex. popopopopopopop
it's like there are unicorns jizzing all over me
every htings is assmilk adn tnohing hruts
only thing that has made me laugh tonight: my friend's fb status "My life is bruined :("
i think he just came in his own ass
i'll just be over here using my tears for lube
herping my derp
My mother and I are singing a song about our Christmas tree called "limp dick" #inspiredtbh
The way he's pressing down on his mangled colon, cum oozing out like toothpaste. A very provocative image. ಠ_ಠ