If only eating healthy was as easy as telling people you’re trying to eat healthy.

Ran into @spockgrrl and it wasn't even planned! Best night ever!

@spockgrrl "I, Sammi, of thee wed Nebraska." "Any objections?" Sharla's hand thrusts vigorously into the air.

Right now, I want to take a vacation and forget my life for a good 2 weeks or forever.

Seattle is actually beautiful and soothing, like a... beautiful, soothing... soothing beauty I HATE WRITING IT'S HARD!' #stabstabregret

The Bluth Frozen Banana Stand is in London today and I am currently on a train going away from there. COME ON!!

@spockgrrl #getit

Getting up ruins the day.

As soon as Jeff Buckley breathes in his "Hallelujah" recording, I know what song it is. #9thsense

Okay. This is really cool.  http://imgur.com/a/tadQc 

Good friends, Prince, and an amazing bike ride home -- heaven or just another day in Colorado?

Are you a sexist re-tweeter? Site gives you a score on the gender parity of who you retweet:  http://twee-q.com/  h/t @cwarzel #AJStream

If teleports were real, I'd so be getting laid.

Seeing "The Great Gatsby" tonight to remind myself not to fall into love with a ditzy blonde chick with a penchant for vehicular homicide.

@spockgrrl And you get a m*%#$@l gift and you get a m*%#$@l gift!

I blue through like 15 episodes of "Arrested Development" today and the night is young!

Dave Matthews Band is bad music. I do not have a joke here or anything clever. Please do not make me listen to them, ever. Thank you.

My last tweet is a Series 4 preview of "Downton Abbey" #DowntonPBS

@spockgrrl also HER FACES IN THE BATHTUB!

@spockgrrl *such as 'have a piece of chocolate cake' or 'have a seat over there'.*