YOU GUYS A KID IN MY BEST FRIEND’S PRESCHOOL CLASS JUST MADE THIS, OH GOD WHAT DO I EVEN DO. SOMEBODY CALL REDDIT. pic.twitter.com/RyPUWIwIWd

@pattonoswalt Actually you could have won by not publicly defending the guy who told a crowd it would be hilarious if a girl got gang-raped?

#FollowAdam_Jacobi RT @mengus22: Woman arrested after depositing marijuana into her bank account. (h/t: @melissamoore) http://t.co/9YZY9dH1

@adam_jacobi Man the “I’m too cool to find this fascinating thing fascinating” crew is out en force today. THEY’RE BROTHERS. THAT IS INSANE.

Watching MSNBC on mute. Guy said "He's releasing his last 10 years of tax returns" and the captioning said "his last 10 years of taxidermy."

A…merica? RT @dangerguerrero: I DON’T KNOW HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THIS RT @nytimes: Narrowsburg Fireworks Canceled to Avoid Harm to Bald Eagles

THIS ONE'S FOR ALL THE TOSTITOS RT @adam_jacobi: Why is Mark Jackson talking about chips

Oh good, a Facebook phone. My parents and their friends will be so excited!

shipping @metricjulie and @jon_bois pretty hard you guys

A 290 pound 9th grader named Brodarius Hamm. Love you forever, football.

Facebook’s most fundamental misunderstanding of their product is their assumption that we like the people we’re Facebook friends with.

#FollowAdam_Jacobi RT @birdlord: "1 suspect found wearing blood-stained clothes, cooking sausage"  http://j.mp/S7h7zf 

and racist baby! RT @max_read: final Newsweek is the "reunion issue": old Diana, angry Muslim, gay Obama ascend to heaven, which is real

lol RT @thinkprogress:Romney camp withdraws statement opposing Lilly Ledbetter Act. New position is he doesn't have one  http://thkpr.gs/RFyHbp 

OH GOD WHAT IN THE HOLY FUCK RT @lukezim: GOD NO WHY RT @treykerby: The worst ice cream ad imaginable: http://t.co/hzLjVgrf (via @videogum)

Really proud of Katie Holmes rescuing Suri from indoctrination at a young age by a crazy religion and then enrolling her in Catholic school.

#FollowAdam_Jacobi RT @marthasugalski: Local man says he had a wasp in his pants & that is why he flashed kids at college park pool.

URGENT ATTN: @jon_bois RT @bubbaprog: VIDEO: Yes, Blake Griffin airballed consecutive free throws http://t.co/a607RtHS

@pile_of_derp @ohholybutt I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH cc @iplaythetuba

RLRT @scott_chill: My god, Idiocracy was a documentary, wasn't it.