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A programmer had a problem and thought to herself, "I'll use threads!". She used immutable data structures and everything worked great.
A new version of Opera was released! Both users downloaded it, so you don't need to target the old one any more!
Nouns: setup, login
Verbs: set up, log in
User: Where do I report bugs?
User: Did you just tell me to go fuck myself?
Dev: I believe I did, Bob.
Nerds: stop making fun of the lottery. We have found a socially acceptable way to tax stupid and you're going to ruin it.
1) Google for error message
2) Find only someone else's pastebin of the traceback
3) It's my coworker
4) Look longingly at scotch bottles
I love how we can hotpatch a running Linux kernel but I still have to restart Firefox to enable/disable extensions.
scene: a dark, smoky office
grizzled programmer: let's investigate the issue
cut to opening https://github.com/mongodb/mongo-java-driver/blob/1d2e6faa80aeb5287a26d0348f18f4b51d566759/src/main/com/mongodb/ConnectionStatus.java#L213 …
rookie sysadmin pukes