A programmer had a problem and thought to herself, "I'll use threads!". She used immutable data structures and everything worked great.

A new version of Opera was released! Both users downloaded it, so you don't need to target the old one any more!

current @sparrow users' status: http://t.co/UDk14eHb

Hey web developers, I made you a handy flowchart to help you know when to use target="_blank": http://t.co/gfKZiXt

Religion:
Prays when you have cancer, says "it's God's plan" if you die.

Science:
GROWS YOU A NEW GODDAMNED THROAT.

http://t.co/V8LghAN

Nouns: setup, login
Verbs: set up, log in

User: Where do I report bugs?

Dev: Bugzilla.

User: Did you just tell me to go fuck myself?

Dev: I believe I did, Bob.

For non-tech people: understanding what a "black triangle moment" means is key to understanding how programmers work: http://t.co/Xp9gqTY

Nerds: stop making fun of the lottery. We have found a socially acceptable way to tax stupid and you're going to ruin it.

Python developers, I made you a helpful flowchart:  http://i.imgur.com/ntz2s9O.png 

With Node you can write Javascript on the front end AND the back end!  http://i.imgur.com/7JEpN.gif 

Just flipped the switch. Learn Vimscript the Hard Way is finally published!

$8 ebook
$20 paperback
$40 hardcover

 http://learnvimscriptthehardway.stevelosh.com/ 

the_big_refactor.gif http://t.co/Ai1rBOwc

The Vim source code by size: http://t.co/WPKKTPcr

Notice that docs make up 1/4 of it? That's because docs are really fucking important.

1) Google for error message
2) Find only someone else's pastebin of the traceback
3) It's my coworker
4) Look longingly at scotch bottles

Published a little blog post I made this weekend: Git Koans.

 http://stevelosh.com/blog/2013/04/git-koans/ …

Programmers, if you haven't seen this talk yet I'm jealous because you're going to have an awesome evening tonight: http://t.co/5wTu0n6x

I love how we can hotpatch a running Linux kernel but I still have to restart Firefox to enable/disable extensions.

Use OS X on a laptop? Install this right now: http://t.co/wWmMPZG

scene: a dark, smoky office

grizzled programmer: let's investigate the issue

cut to opening  https://github.com/mongodb/mongo-java-driver/blob/1d2e6faa80aeb5287a26d0348f18f4b51d566759/src/main/com/mongodb/ConnectionStatus.java#L213 …

rookie sysadmin pukes