@funnyfacts_ wait a minute! does your avi have a penis!

Q: What does mascara and guys have in common? A:They both run at the first sign of emotion

@ilikegirlsdaily PUMPED!!! Your photos + NY Rangers game tonight = MOTHER FUCKING PUMPED!!! LETS GO RANGERS #nyr

@heartcapricorn Emotions? BAH! Capricorns dont have emotions #wehaveblackhearts

Did you hear the new Playboy with Lindsay Lohan on the cover comes with a bag of cocaine and an ankle monitor

if we actually #occupysesamestreet we would be fighting against The Count since he is always counting #mustbehismoney #greedyscumbag

Since men grow beards for movember i wished ladies walked around without shirts for boobietober #seemsonlyfair

Black people get away with #onlywhitepeople but if white people started #onlyblackpeople we all be in court tomorrow for being racists #BS

@geoffcelis @vanduzerdays anybody who has me on their team for that game will automatically win...and ive never played that game before

#openingday Oh yeah baseball is boring! Its Hockey season! then you can waste your lives watching baseball #baseballsucks BOOOOOOOOOOO

#ificouldiwouldbringback Freddie Mercury and john Lennon #musicgods #wouldliketoseethosetwocollaborate

Piritis of the Caribbean #NewDisneyIllnesses

#thingsthedevilinvented Justin Bieber

@auto_bear neither have the Canadians!!

Greece is going to be playing Germany #EuroCup2012 If Greece wins do we still have to pay back the loan? #Greecewinsnomoreloanright?!

Anyone realize the song 'the girl is mine' they never asked her if she wanted both guys? guess MJ and Paul McCartney dont know how to share

Everyone remember that today is free slurpie day at 7-11 from 11am to 7pm...go get some free slurries from those corporate bastards

3 hours till the puck drops! LETS GO RANGERS!!!! #NYR #LETSGORANGERS

WOOT! Made it to the beard list!! http://t.co/1SeQeyfc @thenyrblog

@stefaniealva i see Marty more as a buttercup...Princess Buttercup