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#GhettoBabyNames - Walmartin for a boy and K-Martina for a girl.
I hate it when you're on a date with someone and you gotta walk 10 metres behind & everytime they turn around you gotta jump into the bushes
Going through life with your head in the sand is just an invitation to get butt fucked.
I'm so cheap that my vibrator is a 600 ml bottle of coke with rotting meat and about 50 flies buzzing around inside.
My sex noises sound like a retarded kid who dropped his Popsicle in the sand.
My stint on Draw Something was short lived. People got pissed off when I drew a cock taking a shit to describe Rhianna.
It's a proven fact that if you're homophobic, you're a fucking cunt.
Who needs a bottle opener when you've got a tight asshole and a stern look of determination.
I lost 400 pounds and am having my excess skin removed and made into blankets for the homeless.
My fart just sounded like a duck giving up on life.
Somebody told me I lacked intelligence, I don't even know what that means.
I like to bend over and grab myself around the ankles and push my turd in and out. It's the closet I'll ever get to anal sex.
How can I be empty on the inside when I've drank over half a bottle of tequila.
Justin Bieber was rushed to a Melbourne Hospital after suffering severe stomach cramps. Turns out she was just having her first period.
Lifting your stomach to reveal your two inch penis.
My tits look like rugby socks with bricks in them.
My vibrator has a blow-off valve.
Is it cruel to force my cat into a remote controlled 4X4 with a note taped to her head and make her go to the liquor store?
When I am in bloom I spread my legs whilst my labia minora flop out like a lilly pad waiting for unsuspecting frogs to tongue my goodness.
#RedneckOlympics - Running from the po-leece cause we's bin caught syphoning gasoline marathon.