@marylandmudflap What if Phelps had this tattoo??? http://t.co/ydAvnJxV

Remember, G. Love's newest cd, "Fixin' To Die", drops today! Produced by the Avett Brothers. Go get it!

RT @stevehofstetter Bringing a 4-year-old to a comedy show. pic.twitter.com/sTK7EfguD5

@lifeofliriope You'll rejoice the day I make it back my old stompin' grounds to beat your boobs with fresh flank steaks!!!

@lifeofliriope I was gonna block you, but then you tweeted about roadkill! ;)

@lifeofliriope No thanks necessary. It's part of my contract. ;)

RT @clearlyunwell I’m only here to lower the bar.

RT @boycalledann I feel sorry for Lindsay Lohan, imagine how many Adobe updates she’ll have after rehab.

@lifeofliriope Niether is my ass. <3 you, nerd...err, turd.

RT @thesulk Just because you're an avid reader doesn't mean you're an avid understander.

@lifeofliriope My favorite knitter. So thoughtful.

RT @alshonfubawu No one is as ugly or as beautiful as they think they are.

RT @trevso_electric Dogs: "You're sad? Let me sleep next to you."

Cats: "You're sad? Look at my ass."

@lifeofliriope You know you can do it! I know you can do it! Just do it!!!

RT @stevehofstetter How ridiculous would it have been if that "God made a farmer" commercial was for Monsanto?

RT @trevso_electric "I see bread people :( "
-Dr. Atkins Sixth Sense

@lifeofliriope You may not be perfect, but we love you anyway.

@lifeofliriope Congrats on the 6 month anniversary. Lucky boy!

RT @boleyngirly What do you call a person who's always full of accusations?... It appears they prefer "Officer".

RT @thelastvirgo I have to politely decline the invitation,
to attend your argument.